Future Hitlers for America

A recurring feature in which we keep an eye on the hysteria-inducing madmen of tomorrow, especially our favorite Central Asian megalomaniac.

    Turkmen Leader Attacks Tooth Fashion

    ANXIOUS to banish all signs of backwardness from his remote desert nation Turkmenistan’s president on Tuesday gave a word of advice to the country’s youth: resist the temptation to replace your teeth with gold ones.

    “Don’t be offended,” Saparmurat Niyazov told a female student who caught his eye while she made a speech at the Saparmurat Niyazov Agricultural University. “But whatever some young fellows tell you, white teeth look better.”

    “Besides if you keep your original teeth you can manage harder food,” Niyazov said at the ceremony broadcast on state television.

    The Turkmen leader, officially known as Saparmurat Turkmenbashi (father-of-all-Turkmen), has been anxious to selectively remodel this former Soviet republic in his own image, throwing up vast tower blocks and banishing farm animals from the streets of the capital Ashgabat.

    Recently he has taken to berating young people for their allegedly sloppy appearance and “wayward” behaviour.

Sounds like Hitler to me! When will Christopher Hitchens and co. get on this? Whatever happened to whiskey, democracy, sexy?