Nichols Countdown—8

(see 10 for introduction)
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For Thursday’s Capital Times , John Nichols reworked his latest Nation On-Line Beat entry, which topped Common Dreams’ list Wednesday. The subject was the thwarting of a church’s attempt to celebrate inclusiveness. I’m attempting to celebrate how religiously exclusive John (and by proxy, far too many “progressives”) is when it comes to Palestine, that’s 102 Cap Times columns down, eight to go and he’ll have made it through the year without having used the word “Israel.”

In a letter to the editor in response to a Cap Times editorial in October, 1995, I wondered how the same people who had celebrated the dismantling of apartheid in South Africa were gushing over “the peace process,” i.e., the “formalization and intensification of apartheid in Israel/Palestine…The plan being implemented is to isolate Palestinian population centers. Each enclave is being surrounded by settlements, Israeli army fortresses and crucially, ‘bypass’ roads costing a billion dollars…”

“Born in 1991,” the checkpoints “were greatly reinforced” after the Oslo Accords were signed, Yitzhak Laor writes in the wake of the violin incident.

Amira Hass reports and applauds, the Palestinian Authority is finally taking a practical step against apartheid road construction.

In “Palestinians await someone who offers them freedom,” Nadia Hijab mentions “Marwan Barghouti, whose capture and imprisonment by
Israel during the current uprising evokes comparisons with South Africa’s Nelson Mandela.”

Martin Fletcher, NBC News’ Tel Aviv bureau chief who was previously based in Johannesburg, had this to say in an interview last year:

“The thing is that, to a large extent, Israel today is worse than South Africa. Because if you compare the situation of the blacks under apartheid to the situation of the Palestinians under the Israeli military occupation, the Palestinians’ situation is much worse.

“The idea of apartheid was that the blacks would live separately from the whites, but as long as they were living apart, they could do what they wanted. They were free to travel, to go to the cinema, to go to work, or wherever else they wanted. Here the Palestinians are not free to move because the military dictatorship of this government doesn’t allow it…

“I loved South Africa, but one day I realized that I couldn’t remain there any longer…

“I wonder when the Israelis will look at the Palestinians’ situation and understand that it’s intolerable that a million people should live for so long stuck in their houses without being able to go anywhere.”

“Untolerable” for whom? Yes, 102 columns down, eight to go.

I Don’t Even Know Where to Begin

Or, How Many Daughters Does Michael Ledeen Have?

The following is apparently supposed to be yet another example of the wonderful Iraq news the doggone librull media get up early in the morning to suppress. According to our source, the young lady who authored this e-mail from the Green Zone "is in charge of getting water to the entire country of Iraq."

Emphasis mine.

    ……Work has been going really well, though extremely busy and increasingly stressful. I have learned a lot about program management, and how to be an advocate. It is a fascinating position, where I feel like I “own” the water sector, like it is my own child that I have to protect, rear, and help grow to her full potential. Learning about how to manage a program, from the project execution side, to the budgetary and funding side, has been an experience that I never would’ve imagined. Interacting with engineers who are just so passionate about this water project or that has been eye-opening – they had such a different perspective on the world than pure “policy” people. Each day I try my best to noodle all the issues, from technical, to coordination, to optics, to security, to logistics, to funding – and protect the money the sector has left – so that we can get people drinkable water, sewer systems, irrigation canals, and dams. I am learning a lot about management too – and trying to be a good manager by giving folks the tools they need to succeed. I’m not any good, I’ve found. It’s funny what issues arise that you have to deal with as a manager… I do sometimes feel like a parent over here.

What a great time to learn about management – while in charge of getting water to the entire country of Iraq. And as for the parenting bit, I’ve heard a lot about children having children, but this takes the cake.

    A little more about management… over the past week, I’ve had to have meetings with folks in my sector about roles and responsibilities. It was a very odd position to be in, because it really isn’t my style to tell someone what they are supposed to do, what I do, and that what I do is tell them what to do. It’s different from, as Fumie would call it, “smack down” sessions we might have with agencies, only because it is an institution v. institution issue. Here, it is a position v. position issue (i.e. my position is different from yours…). I had to have a talk with my deputy actually this week, where I had to softly lay down the law… I had talking points I had drafted earlier, because I was so nervous. He took it well – he is a military guy after all – and since then, things have gone smoothly ….Another management skill I’m learning. There are a ton of things I need to learn, I’ve quickly discovered.

No matter what you think about this war, I think we can all sympathize with the "military guy" who had to endure that talking-to.

    On a totally unrelated matter – The other day, I was offered the position of Dep. Director of Programs (aka “Knothole”), where I would help oversee all of the sectors that we are doing reconstruction in – water, electricity, oil, buildings/health/education, security and justice, and roads/communications. I am definitely flattered that I have been offered the job, but I am also really liking running the water sector, and am trying to figure out maybe how I can do both. I did a whole decision matrix the other night, and weighted it (one of the items in the “con” side of the “doing both” option – provided by a good friend of mine – was “sh#$tty home life”. Heh). I think I am going to try to do both, but where I have defined a narrower scope of what I call “deputy director”. I ran it by the big cheese last night, and he seemed to like the idea. It’s so funny how everyone has a title for everything over here.

    […]

    Things here in the Green Zone are a little more monotonous than when I first started here, simply because we are restricted to where we are allowed to go in here. Essentially, we are only allowed to be in the Palace compound, or at my work building, or the PX (the little concessionary store with stuff)… no real restaurants or anything. We are supposed to wear our flak jackets and helmet everywhere we go, which is a big fat pain because the jacket is super bulky and heavy, and a sad fashion statement when paired up with khakis and blue sneakers. Oh well. The place has been hit by mortars or rockets almost every day, but the injuries and such have been limited. Folks outside aren’t spot on with the targeting, which is real good for all of us! It’s odd though, I don’t really even flinch when I hear something pass over me. The other day, I was on the balcony in the Palace, and all of a sudden I heard a whizzing sound, which means that it is a rocket, pass over – apparently it hit the fountain on the north side of the Palace, which is about maybe 2 city blocks away. I was more interested in the rocket than scared… I suppose it is a function of just having to survive over here – if you got anxious every time something was shot in, you’d never be about to concentrate. […]

Remember: this is the good news.

    Ooh – another food incident! Last Sunday I went out with some friends to the Al Rasheed hotel, this hotel in the Green Zone. It is guarded by these Marines (I’ve found that many Marines are very very serious about their job…). Anyway, we were driving and came upon this checkpoint. The driver, Allen, didn’t notice the stop sign, and was going about 10 mph over the speed limit. Bad idea. The Marine guarding the checkpoint ran up, and started yelling at us to stop, and drew his gun. Allen slammed on the brakes, and I rolled my window down. The Marine was visibly very very angry at us, and said in no uncertain terms that we had not followed instructions. In fact, he said that in about 5 seconds he was able to fire – not good news for me, as the one sitting in the passenger seat, and the target of his potential firing… yikes. It gives new meaning to traffic violation… no tickets, just deadly force. Yikes.

Funny anecdote.

(Thanks to Matthew Yglesias.)

Kill the Martians

A new threat has emerged against freedom; the threat from life on Mars:
“Earth’s defences may need to be boosted against risk of potentially deadly microbes returning on space probes”

This represents the greatest threat to democracy since Saddam Hussein. What we need is a full-scale “shock-and-awe” campaign against these dangerous Martians. It’s us or it’s them. No mercy. I say we finally use all of those swell nukes we’ve got. Launch them against the Martian populace and watch them run for the hills. The survivors will damn sure submit. Then we’ll install a liberal democracy there that will be pliant to US policy makers, and friendlier to Israel.

Who knows? the Martians may even welcome our arrival, cheering us as we march through their streets, blasting everything in sight. We will show them true freedom. Perhaps we can even turn these Martians into Christians – exactly the way of which Christ would have approved, of course – at gunpoint.

The best part of it is, the whole bloody campaign pays for itself! All we have to do is extract Martian oil, and we’ll be filthy rich! We’ll get the price of crude down to two bucks a barrel, you’ll see. We’ll turn those Martians into our SLAVES! And what a sweetheart deal we’ll make it for our buddies at Halliburton!

There is the issue of how to drum up public support for all of this, but I think I can suggest a way. Perhaps if we only talk in meaningless abstractions, such as “freedom,” “liberty,” “happiness,” “greatness,” etc., the waters will be too muddy for the average person to object. Besides, most people would rather rent two-star (if that) movies than actually think about what we’re saying.

If anyone objects at home, we’ll use the flag against them. We’ll accuse them of treason, we’ll say that they are conspiring with the enemy, that they are on the side of the Martian terrorists, and that they’re Enemies of America. We will unfurl football-field sized flags, and chant the national anthem as loud as we can to drown their traitorous arguments.

True, people will die, perhaps needlessly, but it’s all for the greater good. You can’t make an omelet without breaking some eggs.

How to Win the Presidency

The “bombs-and-Jesus crowd” (Hunter Thompson’s decade-old description) – whose heart is in Dixie – has become the decisive voting bloc in American politics.

For nearly a century after the civil war Dixie voted solidly Democrat until a magic bullet in Dallas killed the last Yankee king and broke the spell. Soldier/ spy Bush traded New England for Texas, followed by millions of others, filling the south with voters. In 2000 and 2004 every former Confederate state supported the lad who was born to be king, while he lost the rest of the country in a landslide. Do the math: In last month’s election Bush Jr. received 100% of Dixie’s (142) electoral votes but only 36% of the non-Dixie states’ (396) votes.

As antiwar Republicans like to point out, the Democrats have been the war party, so why hope for change? Because of the change in demographics: the Dems were arguably the more warlike party when they were the Dixie party (and the chief Dem warmongers – Wilson, Truman and Johnson – were southerners). They no longer are.

Since the Kennedy assassination, three Democrats have won the presidency; all three were southerners who ran against non-southerners. The pattern is clear. Antiwar Democrats should start looking now for a male, fiscally conservative, Protestant, Southern, war vet with a conservative personal life (and a similar VP) to run in 2008 – getting past Hillary won’t be easy.

More:

Condescendingly British, perhaps, but worthwhile: see “Sword of Honor” and a worthwhile reply on Grim’s Hall blog.

Roll out the Iraqi tanks

Who do these guys think they’re kidding?

However, Qassim Dawoud, Iraq’s national security adviser, said insurgent attacks were down since the invasion of Fallujah. He provided no details but said Iraq didn’t need U.S.-led coalition forces’ help to safeguard the election.

“We don’t want to involve the multinational forces in the election affairs,” he said. “We are taking our measures to provide security to our society, specifically to the electoral centers.”

Defense Minister Hazem Shaalan told Al-Jazeera television that Iraqi tanks and armored vehicles would patrol the streets during the election to ensure security.

Yeah, roll out the First Iraqi Mechanized Brigade! Of course! All four of those tanks can patrol “the streets,” no problem. What a bunch of jokers. Who picked these guys, anyway?

November was Iraq’s Deadliest Month

The Department of Defense released the names of three more US troops killed in Iraq, bringing the November US death total in Iraq to 137, the highest since the war began. In April of this year, 135 US troops were killed. Each of the three soldiers killed died from enemy action:

Sgt. Pablo A. Calderon, 26, of Brooklyn, N.Y.,
and Sgt. Jose Guereca, Jr., 24, of Missouri City, Texas, “died Nov. 30 in Fallujah, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near their military vehicle.” Also, Spc. Sergio R. Diazvarela, 21, of Lomita, Calif., “died Nov. 24 in Ar Ramadi, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near his dismounted patrol.”

The military also reports that at least 71 of the those 137 died in the “liberating” of Fallujah. All told, 1,258 US troops have died since the war on Iraq began, with over 1,100 of those deaths occurring after the mission was deemed “accomplished.”